Dismayed at low recruiting numbers in the Army and Marine Corps, U.S. officials have decided the best way to cope is to simply change their criteria for entry into those armed forces to allow more convicts into service.

I found this partial breakdown of the waiver grantees interesting:

250 burglars - apparently they will rob the insurgents of their will to fight.

87 aggravated assaulters - these roughnecks will round up any of the insurgents who successfully guarded their will to fight from the 250 burglars.

56 grand larcenists - to orchestrate an Oceans 11-style sting operation, relieving the Taliban of their strangle hold on the Khyber Pass.

11 convicted of carrying weapons into public schools - obviously they will be backing up the aggravated assaulters; perhaps in sniper positions.

7 convicted of making terrorist threats, including bomb threats against the U.S. - counter-insurgency...duh!

5 sex offenders - okay, I've got nothing here.  Why are sex offenders allowed to do anything other than suffer?  Maybe that will be their new job - decoys.

What I found most bizarre was Army spokesman Paul Boyce's defense of the new policy, conveyed in email and reading (in part):

"...today's young men and women ... are being charged for offenses that in earlier years wouldn't have been considered a serious offense, and might not have resulted in charges in the first place..."

What was that?  Aww, shucks folks...these kids didn't mean nuthin' by it when they beat that ole feller senseless, stole his money and called in that durned bomb threat!  His message seems to suggest that the U.S. military is opting to judge its applicants not by our country's laws today, but by the laws of some bygone golden era, when grand larceny, aggravated assault and sex crimes were seen simply as rambunctious behavior; something any healthy, lusty American might be expected to do.  Perhaps Mr. Boyce is on to something.  Next time you're pulled over for speeding, gently suggest to the officer that in past decades he wouldn't have had his radar gun and other sophisticated means of detecting your excessive speed (and, besides, you were only expressing your freedom).  Then assert that you should be allowed a pass, or "waiver" to speed.  After all, today's laws are stifling and really just kind of silly, aren't they?

In fairness to the new recruits, many of the offenses were committed when they were juveniles, but even the House Oversight Committee chairman is openly wondering about the motivation for lowering the standards.

All joking aside for a moment, is this not a clear indication that the American public - even the most depressed sectors, who historically continue to enlist because they need the benefits - has officially lost interest in prosecuting this administration's stupid and pointless activities in Iraq?  Recruitment bonuses and scholarship money are at an all-time high (much, much higher than when I enlisted more than 15 years ago even after adjusting for inflation) and the military can't manage to coax our youth into the fold.

A jump in felon recruitment over 80% tells me the well of believers, or even non-believers who simply need jobs, has dried to a puddle.  It's way past time to knock this crap off.